Spaceship flying

At first I saw only the evening star.

It disappeared while we went through some turbulence. Understandable, after all - we could've been travelling through a cloud.

But then I saw a flicker in the periphery.

Not the flicker of a plane wing at night.

And I waited. And it happened again and again and my friend, I saw a thunderstorm from above. The sky as it flashed in the distance. Thunderstorm raging down below this calm, calm veil. Underneath calm calm stars that stretch out and are so damn close. And a shooting star. If my eyes did not deceive me. It was a shooting star and I tell you, I wished for something I've always yearned for more blatantly than ever. Something I didn't even speak aloud myself inside my heart. And whether or not it was because I'm watching wish you were all here (I think) at the moment which by the way I am loving. Paused at the moment because the thunderstorm was too amazing. And this is a new year. So many weird and wonderful things happened yesterday - from this crazy occurrence of meeting a girl inside of MUJI, having her approach me at first saying: are you korean? To I really like the way you're dressed. To can we meet for coffee? Then actually meeting for the said coffee and me while talking to her, unbelievably in Chinese where I have limited higher up vocabulary to realising there are so many of her thoughts that I've had. To the freedom of having to hide nothing, talking to what was a perfect stranger about deep dark things. Having the same said thoughts uttered in exactly the same fashion all be it in Chinese, and then after that coffee, choosing to walk the way I did. Looking up at that precise moment as I turned the corner and meeting Cindy there. Laughter tumbling out. All worryless. Going to big egg and friend. Life is really made of choices. Although you don't know you're taking it. Actively, you don't think it. But those same choices lead us to such weird and wonderful things. Like me choosing to go back into MUJI after seeing the girl look at me with interest. And us ending up again at the same spot. So many things and so many choices. That create the person we are today. That make us who we are.

What will you do if you don't get into specialist? Take a year off and go to Japan. Travel for a few months in Europe. Throw all plans and maps to the wind and run run run. I'll let my steering wheel loose and let the currents take me where they may. Anywhere. I'll live with a goal, but at once aimlessly. These russet dreams as they are. As I lust for.

What has really change in me these past months? Thoughts like this go immediately and unedited on this space. No more read and reread. No more - am I being too honest here? No more - that's too private to go up. I don't know what has changed really.

Thinking back to the start of errant thoughts, when I agonised over public or private. When I chose not to write for an audience but instead for myself. That was when the private button went up and all was buried. But you know, I guess I ended up wanting not to let these thoughts fester away in the dark. That at least, here, they can exist. Not just lay waste in the deepest part of my soul. Cause these thoughts at least. Of me, me and me. I want to share. 

But you know. I can see the clouds as we travel through them at thousands of miles per hour. They leave almost as soon as we arrive. But we're the ones moving, actually. Dips and dabbles. Is this that feeling? Or meeting someone, doing something. Having it last only for s short while. But so much weight and meaning behind it. Short, significant, inspiring exchanges. I'll never be that person. There are too many flaws in me. (And my movie just got reset. How annoying.) But I'll work on it. I'll try my best. Set my goals. Not get too caught up. Not impose. Not lose my temper so easily or be so stubborn. And friend. It is so beautiful up here. 

Is this what it's like to fly in spaceship? 

To cruise up here. Watching the miles fall away. Rocketing along to the next new beginning. To a New Year. A new start, I haven't yet set my New Years resolutions. 

But it'll be something like this.

Food: Eat healthy. Learn to cook. Either learn to: ice skate, dance, yoga, go gym. Photography: 365 challenge, dig up more projects to do.

I won't ever play piano the way I want to. Itll never be as perfect as I want it to be my head. I can't replicate that. It all falls apart the minute I try. No patience.

Why don't I finish things in my head? Why must I write it all down to feel like I've filed it away? Means I accumulate too much dust and clutter in my heart.

I'm also happy all went well today and I managed to get a seat change. The window seat inspires me. People watching inspires me. I wonder how others perceive me. Want to see myself through another's eyes. There's s baby crying. 

Watching this movie and realising the importance of siblings. How easily we can talk. How we can insult and scream and fight all we want and how it will never change. I love you. I will always love you. Is the recurrent message from this trip. Fr my family and loved ones. That even if the sky falls down, we will still be here to hold it up. The kind of friendship that dog and deer had. Kate and Pippin. Which reminds me I still need to watch the hobbit. I think I'm now transcribing my thoughts as they run through my head. Fingers are not moving as fast as they can. Right. At the spot again. Almost went over the fastforwarding. Hush for now.

Appreciate

After I tried to take videos myself, I realised how hard it was to make even a coherent short of what I wanted to express. Which in turn made me appreciate and respect directors and filmmakers so so much more. Adding another dimension to the time I spent at Eslite this time, trawling through movies I wanted to watch and figuring out for myself certain things.

Holding a camera with a steady hand to keep it from shaking while adjusting the lens to gain the focus of you want and to express through that medium of the scene you want to note forever using your bare hands is quite an amazing thing. And you know, now that I've finally figured out how to use the recording mode of my dslr after more than a year (despicable and incompetent, I know) means I will probably use it more often. So much of what I want to capture shows on film and not as a still. But I suppose that too is a skill I would need to achieve, hey? To express it through a still. Finding my own identity and my 'eye' through my looking glass, so as to say.

That said, the gift of the 55-200mm lens is just amazing.

It renders the world into a completely different kind and has really brought about a whole new perspective on the everyday I see. I can see it now, every time I look at a scene or a photo and I can see that hey, it might have been taken with this, the thought process of the photographer.

And the recent trip up the mountains has also taught me how to appreciate binoculars. Of all things, hey? 

Adjusting to focus of the binoculars from near to far. Making it so the two visual fields overlap and it forms a perfect circle and completely widens your view of the world. It's so much fun experimenting out bush.

It reminds me of microscopes and year 11 and looking at plants in bio lab and then of me taking photos of how perfect everything looked under the microscope. I've got to find that photo again.

But for now, allow me to introduce: through the binoculars, I saw grass (蘆葦草).

Underwhelming, I know. 

But so very exciting for me.

Travel thoughts from 2012

Life consists of meetings and partings - make the most of time you have together; talk to strangers, they may end up becoming the most important parts of your life; give the people in your life your all, love them unconditionally; don't be petty, especially with money - it is easily replenished, but not a broken relationship. Sometimes, just let some things go; don't be so prone to anger; be patient, be kind and compassionate, be bold, be brave; where possible, give; appreciate what you have and be thankful always.

We all start off as strangers, but somehow, something brings us together. Do you believe in fate? I do. Somehow in the course of the year, I forgot this belief, and let the demons of my present take me. Whatever will be, will be. It doesn't mean you do naught and let the course of nature take over, but rather, just let things be. If you experience a setback, then it is for a reason - though not always to be known immediately. Live your days into your unanswered questions. Don't be so neurotic and controlling about every single aspect of your life. Just breathe. Let it go. Don't be cynical about love either, whether you achieve the coveted happily ever after depends on your choices and how willing you are to give, how hard you work, how strong your will is in never giving up on the person you love.

Remember that there is always a way. Functional end arteries of the heart were designed so an alternate path could be developed and taken in dire need. We can do the same.

While on the bus back to I-lan from Taipei, December 16 2012

Postcards from Phillip Island

"How many times in your life will you walk in the pelting rain, in face of a rising tide with the ocean lapping at your feet in Phillip Island?" 

So I reasoned, and we continued on.

Encapsulating Hakuna Matata.

That little ducky makes me so happy every time I see it.

Double rainbow and sunshowers.
Position yourself 40 degrees with your back towards the sun.

Food coma after food coma.

Under- and overestimations, next time we'll get it right.

 

Why, thank you Space Team. 

Hahaha, fun times.

Obligatory cloud photo in memory of the old days.

What more do you require? Hee.

We thought we'd be able to spend a whole morning here.
Until we drove by after Peninsula Hotsprings and reformulated our plans.

"Amy, do you want to try and see how durable that Totoro will be after you drop it?"

Brilliant end to the trip.

Can't wait till the next one.

Studycation

Is it sad that no one asked me what I meant by a 'studycation' whenever I mentioned it in my answer to, "What are your plans for the Easter break?"

Or maybe they were too polite to enquire further.

First few days of the Easter break was spent at the loveliest cottage.

...with a pile of lecture notes and books.

The song, 家後, goes on replay in my mind whenever I look back at this photo.

In fifty years' time, when we've retired and all - wouldn't it'd be nice to spend lazy April afternoons out in the sunshine and porch like so, reminiscing about old times?

Tea light!

Sunday morning breakfast.

Canisters of tea and coffee. 

Aside from the cottage being a mini, all its appliances - including bins and recycling container were too! Just so cute.

Was slightly disappointed at the surroundings attractions, but the cosiness of the cottage made up for it. And what with the purpose of the trip, it was a good three-days' worth of solid study without the distractions of normal day-to-day activities around the house and, of course, the notorious internet.

Bittern Railway Cottage

Westernport Bay, Victoria

Rediscovery

Catch ups led to day trip planning led to a trip to 1000 steps (I really need to get fit), Sassafras and the National Rhododendron Gardens.

I finally know the name of places.

Waited for ages, but it was worth it.

To satisfy a year-long craving, which ended up tasting better in my memory, but good nevertheless.

 

Always look up when you're there.

Only good polaroids of the day.

Found a bench under an oak tree. This kind of scene previously existed only in my imagination and foreign countries.

Can't wait to come back in Autumn.

Lost in Time

In the Venetian, it is always twilight.

There, time is halted.

And you - unknowingly, suddenly - find yourself lost in time. 

Enter in the early afternoon, and exit so many hours, disorientated.

Where did time go?

It reminded me so much of the scene in The Cat Returns.
Eternal twilight.

All I could ask myself was, where did the inspiration for either come?

The Last Time

I was in an Eslite store, I stumbled across a travel photojournal of a man who visited all the forgotten towns by traditional train (台鐵). I will probably never find it again, but lately, this memory is constantly on my mind.

It's such a raggedly romantic way of travelling.

Picture this: Sunlight spilling into and over the seats. Traditional Taiwanese boxed lunch with the pork cutlet, braised egg and greens. Familiar accents. Gentle rocking to and fro. Amazing scenery. My camera. Books I love. Books to lose myself in. Places to see, conversations to be heard, and people to meet.

Places to go

Last month, W visited Sydney for a short trip and brought me back goodies!

I love receiving postcards. That macaron was divine.

Time to explore Sydneyyy.

"Time's up. I'm on my way."

Pack your bag.

More than ever, I wonder if this will ever be a possibility.

But my ship is already sailing, my seas almost charted. 

Will I ever?

Hoffentlich

Hoffentlich, travel blog from my last trip to Taiwan/HK with friends that extended into the summer holidays, but somehow I never went back.

Travel Plans

My recent employment means I am close to 80% sure I want to return to Taiwan at the start of next year.
It also means Korea is fast becoming more than a possibility.

Oh, there's so much to do!

美麗之島

Formosa Boulevard Station, Kaohsiung

Departure gates

Fly away on a plane,
Just like you came to me.

鹽埕區

米糕 It has taken me more than ten years to finally figure out exactly where in Kaohsiung all my favourite childhood food is. I never thought to pay enough attention in my past trips. The streets were always a blur. Conveniently, everything is located within one suburb: 鹽埕區.

Wanderlust

Seized by a sudden desire to move back to Taiwan and establish myself in Taipei.

I'm replaying recent memories from the week spent there last December and now I just can't wait to go back.

I really do hope everything works out and that I'll find myself boarding a plane to Seoul, Korea at the very beginning of next year. I have a feeling that would be an amazing experience.